Day Six - In your eyes

Hi, how have you been? I know, sometimes I just miss you. I want to see you, but I can't because I have some reasons. What is the definition of love? That's you, someone that I really adore. You know, I do not want to know you more. Why? Can I keep this secret to myself only?. I'm extremely sorry for everything I did; I want to save myself, my life, my dreams, my future education, and vice versa. 

You know what I meant, right? You are smart, very cool!. That is why I like you so much. God! I hate this feeling, honestly. Okay, let me explain something:

This is my love, too. The quote is from Khalil Gibran. Yeah, you know I like writing. I'm crying now. Maybe you are questioning?, Do you worry there? Hahaaa, staying away from things which can make me sad is important. 

"When you love, you should not think you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course."

Gibran wants to convey that loving means lowering the ego and opening the heart. We must be ready to be shaped by love, not trying to shape love according to our will. Love is a teacher, not a student.

Love cannot be controlled: Gibran emphasizes that love is a great and free force. We cannot force how love should go or develop according to our wishes. Love is selective: If love “deems you worthy,” it will enter and guide you. This means that true love cannot be forced, but comes as a gift to those who are sincere and ready to receive. Love changes the direction of life: Instead of you determining where love should go, love itself can lead you in unexpected directions, whether it be happiness, sacrifice, or personal growth.

What do you think about whether we like each other? We are still confused about the future and are even thinking about everything. What should we do next? This is not the right time; we know that. The fact is, Yashh! Ok, please don't be angry. 

We know that Allah is the best planner; he manages everything. Some people may not understand what we feel. You have to trust yourself. You can do it! It's hard to do a-b-c then jump to xyz, but you are the winner; it started at birth. Am I sounding like a motivator? Yes, I'm.

Saturday night, and I have many words to write. I hope you understand.

I want us to meet without any pressure and wounds, you meet me, me too. I want you to be safe in achieving all your hopes. I want you to understand how this life is only temporary. This world is just a game. I may have hurt you now, but this decision is very comforting for me, for you, it may be difficult; you must be asking, why? I know you are sensitive, you can keep everything neatly and carefully, but that's you.

When we might be far apart, believe me, many hands are praying for you, believe me! That smile warms many people. You can hate me, you're not happy. Yes, of course. You can stay away from me, but if we're destined, come pick me up someday.

Later, when you feel tired, go far away, alone, but always be patient. Come on, you always have room to have a dialogue with yourself. You don't even have to look perfect in the eyes of people. It's time for you to take that long journey, just one: please be patient! I will find you there, if love takes me there, God knows everything.

Staying away does not mean taking a bad step. People out there are so noisy showing off their wedding day, their days with their cute baby. Then I can also celebrate my little achievement; I deserve happiness. In my head, I'm just imagining my journey. I announce the PhD. Imagine giving that one to you, honey, and you will hug me and say, "I love you, darling, Zara." For now, let's reach our biggest dream, work and pray so hard, and do the ikhtiar and tawakkal. May you always smile every day.

Cause I know I don't let you see. 

But you mean the world to me. 

What the hell is wrong with me?

I just sat there and watched you leave

I am not this ice queen

There's a fear that I've known

And I'm so sorry I've never shown

Thank you. You mean the world to me - Freya Ridings.