Oops, I’m a Mom! One Month with My BCA Girls

I'm gonna start this work with Franz Kafka quotes "By believing passionately in something that still does not exist, we create it. The nonexistent is whatever we have not sufficiently desired". Hi, my sweetheart: Bilita, Chloe, and Airin.

Thank you so much for calling me "Mom" during our one-month program. You have no idea how happy it made me feel. The way you cared for me, with your warmth and affection, truly touched my heart. Though, you are still so young and full of sweetness, you have already carved a special place in my heart that I'll always cherish.

My little baby 

Sometimes I ask myself, "Do I really look like a mother?" Maybe not yet, but one day, I will be and when that time comes, I will remember the three of you, who first made me feel what it's like to be one.

So, my first child, Bilita; the sunshine who spreads happiness wherever she goes, a beautiful girl whose lips are never far from kind words, whose heart glows with gentleness and grace. My dear honey, do you know something? life may feel heavy sometimes, but as long as you carry God in your heart, you will always find your way through the storm. Believe me, sweetheart, you have such an amazing potential within you. With your long, flowing hair and your tall, graceful figure, you remind me of a pine tree standing strong in the midst of glacial view (the glacier national park) in Montana; serene, steadfast, and full of quiet beauty. My love will always stay with you, wherever life leads you, my darling Bilita.

Bilita, my dear, I know that sometimes you need a little space to think because being smart and thoughtful isn't always easy. There will be days when you feel tired of time itself, of people, or of the situations that don't go your way. But, my darling remember this: Keep growing love in your heart.

I can see in your eyes a spark of hope and a deep desire to make something beautiful out of life. Hold on to that light. Stay humble, be kind to everyone you meet, and never let the world harden your gentle soul and when things don't go as planned, remember "If plan A doesn't work, there are still 25 more letters in the alphabet. Keep believeing, keep trying, and keep dreaming, my lovely girl. The world is waiting for your brilliance to bloom.

Hi, my dearest Chloe, my lovely middle child, the one whose patience shines like morning light. You are the girls who never stops asking questions after class, whose curiosity makes every moment richer. Darling, you are wonderfully intelligent, and I'm endlessly proud of you. I admire the quiet grace in the way you walk through life; humble, steady, and full of thought. I love how you shape your mind with wisdom and your actions with purpose.

Honey, I know life isn't gentle. There will be days when people misuderstand you or moments that make you uncomfortable. But please, stay true to yourself, the cheerful, bright, beautifully "academically crazy" girl who never loses her spark. Keep learning, keep laughing, and keep shining, my Chloe. You are a masterpiece in progress and I love every part of who you are.

Chloe, my curious little busyhead, sometimes our minds just need to run wild, don't they? I know you cannot stand those moments when things don't go as planned, when your story feels a little off-track or when success seems to play hide-and-seek with you. But hey, darling, listen! be that girl who still tries, even after failure, frustration, and a touch of heartbreak. Be the one who laughs, wipes her tears, grabs a snack, and says, "Okay life, round two - let's go again!".

You have got the courage, the brains, and that unstoppable spark that makes you, you. Believe me, honey, good things are already on their way to you, they are just taking a scenic route because you deserve something extra special!.

My sweetest Airin, my little one, my heart's gentle melody. Thank you, darling, for your precious presence. You complete my world in the most beautiful way. With you, Bilita, and Chloe, my life feels painted in colors I never knew existed, shades of love, laughter and the tender mercy of the Lord above. Every step of our journey together, you have shown such warmth and care. You listen, you notice, you love and that means more than words could ever say.

So, baby remember this "Loneliness isn't the absence of people, it's the absence of being understood" - Franz Kafka.

When I look at you, my dear, i see the purity of a newborn soul; soft, radiant, and deeply loved by everyone around you. You remind me of grace itself, delicate, kind and full of wonder. You are my little star, my tender joy, the gentle heartbeat that reminds me how blessed I am to be called "Mom".

I have had so many little adventures with you, we have walked side by side, helped each other, shopping and yes! had those silly, tiny fights that somehow made us even closer. You know what it feels like? It's like I accidentally got married to a cute little baby at 25! Hahaha. I love you endlessly, my darling. Even when I get a bit emotional (you know how your 'mom' can be!), my heart just can't help but overflow with love for you. You have taken up permanent space in my thoughts, and my love for you keeps growing bigger and fluffier every single day!

You know, my darling, we never really knew when it all began, it just happened, like a soft sunrise we did not notice until the light touched our hearts. But every memory, every glance you gave me, every way you cared for and even judged me, they all stay beautifully etched in my soul. It was never perfect, but somehow, it felt perfect!. Being a mother isn't only about being present, it's about loving, protecting, and giving every piece of your heart without asking for anything in return and in your own special way, my dear, you did that for me too. You made me feel safe, seen, and loved, and for that I'll always carry you gently in my heart.

And so, my three little stars: Bilita, Chloe, and Airin, you have each filled my heart in your own beautiful way. Bilita, with your warmth and strength that shine like sinlight after the rain. Chloe, with your wisdom, humor and unshakable curiosity that make every day feel alive and Airin my tender soul, whose gentle heart wraps love arond us like a soft melody. Each of you has taught me something precious, about patience, courage, and the kind of love that never asks to be repaid. When I think of you, I see not just a children, but little reflections of grace that God sent to remind me how beautiful life can be. 

No matter where the road takes us, remember this: you are my forever story, written not with ink, but with love and thousands unforgetabble moments.

Your Love, Zara!